For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16

The best gift any one of us could receive. And it is totally free. And even better than battery powered muskrats!

Merry Christmas to all.

SCG

Sometimes, actually, most of the time these days, I feel like I am living in a world designed by Woody Allen. In his good days, 30 years ago. The world is just whacky! Take this for an example. My wife and I go to a county park known for its trees, which is quite unusual for South Florida. If the slimy pieces of muskrat snot developers haven’t turned a piece of land into gigantic condos or big box stores, the county will “create a park”, by bull dozing down every tree, bush and blade of grass and then planting urban trees (they never grow to more than 8 feet) and then call it a park. But this park is an old park, one that wasn’t “built” or “developed”. It is pretty much natural. Which is what my wife and I call a park, not the concrete, flat grass and tiny trees parks! This one is Tree Tops Park in Broward County. Beautiful park, for these parts.

But guess what? It is pretty much closed. Oh, the concrete and flat parts are open, but all of the trails through the woods to the lake are closed! Why???? Because of Hurricane Wilma! Yes, Hurricane Wilma stormed through this area last month. Kicked over loads of trees. The park supposedly lost 4,000 trees, which is what the pre-teen ticket taker at the front gate said. I’m not so sure she is going to score all that high on the math section of her SAT, but that’s another story.

We entered the park, pretty much ignoring her warnings that most of the park was off limits. Like, why would that be? Well, foolish us. The park, most if not all of the trails, was closed. We thought and we thought and thought why that would be, as we stepped over the yellow crime scene keep out tape and walked down the trails. The only possible reason we could come up with is that Woody Allen has taken over the world, and we are all stuck inside one of his fine but whacky movies from the 70’s.

I guess some nitwit thought that with trees fallen down; someone could possibly walk into the trucks, fall over onto their ass, and then dial 1-800-LAWYERS SUCK and sue the crap out of the county. But then my wife, who always was the nearly normal one, reasoned that what difference would the trails be now versus before the storm? It is a natural trail, with large roots, holes, grass and weeds and all kinds of things one always had to step over and just be cautious about. How the hell could the trails be any different now? A tree down here and there? Hey, we are adults. We know how to walk around a tree, you county bureaucratic buffoons!

Of course, there is another possible reason. The government just loves telling citizens what they can or can’t do. It is a control thing. Wear your seatbelt! Wear your helmet! Don’t drive the speed the roads were designed for! Don’t go here! Don’t go there! Stay out!

We enjoyed our hike through these off limit trails nevertheless.

Tree Top Parks administration, whoever ordered these trials closed needs to do two things. First; Read the United States Constitution! Second; Pull your head outta your butt hole!

Peace out people
SCG

Ford Ranger 2005 Still Americas Best Selling Compact With The Best Ford Replacement Parts

Ford Ranger has been America’s best-selling compact pickup for 17 years.


Ford Ranger has been America ’s best-selling compact pickup for 18 years running, offering genuine “Built Ford Tough” heritage in a high-quality high-value package. It has been honored five consecutive years for highest ownership loyalty by R. L. Polk & Co.

I could link to a dozen other sites, all stating that the Ford Ranger pick-up has been and continues to be the best selling truck in it’s class, hands down. It also has received the highest ownership loyalty rating for the last five years!

Yet, read any critic’s review of the vehicle, and you would think it is some piece of junk manufactured in Romania from used pie tins. Here is a quote from Edmonds.com:

Old, tired and completely outclassed by its competition, the Ranger only deserves a look if you’re content with a cheap price and passable performance.

The reports for most other “automobile reviewers”, like that is suppose to be a real job, are similar.

What’s the deal? Hmmm…let me figure this out. Fact 1) More people choose the Ford Ranger over any other truck in it’s class. Fact 2) The Ford Ranger receives the highest ownership loyalty rating the last five years. Fact 3) Automobile reviewers are scum sucking bottom feeders, who like all other “reviewers”, be it movie, plays or anything else, are full of weasel hot air.

My Ford Ranger has about 120,000 miles on it, and it drives as well as it did when I pulled it out of the lot in 1998 with seven miles on it. Do I take care of it? No. I change the oil only when the oil on the stick develops into alien life forms and starts climbing onto the windshield. I don’t rotate the tires. In fact, I don’t do anything but drive it every single day.

I did have one problem with it a year ago. Some butt nut ran a stop sign last year and came about a hundred bucks from totaling the truck. The dealer took two weeks to put it back together. It continues to run smooth and straight, just like in 1998.

Sure, there are fancy trucks out there costing in the mid $20′s, $30′s or $40′s. Sure, they may look fancier and have fancier instruments or French press coffee makers in the dash. But why am I going to pay that kind of money when all I need or desire is a solid, reliable pick-up truck that will take me from point A to point B in comfort and ease? And never, ever break down.

The answer is I am not. When the time comes that I have to put my Ranger down, I’ll be purchasing another ranger. An unsophisticated, un-styled, reliable pick-up truck.

Sure, the Ranger never gets a good review or rating. Just what really counts. People buy them more than any other truck in it’s class, and the owner loyalty rating is astoundingly high, consistently.

The reviewers, including Edmunds.com, can go play with rabid muskrats.

Peace out folks.
SCG

I’ve been searching for an excused to use the word “underboobed” in my blog for months. Now I have one! Our good friend and excellent artist, Norman Gitzen, provided me with this opportunity. If you recall from one of my previous blog entries, Mr. Gitzen is the artist who made waves with his busty siren sculpture that was on display in the city of Wellington, Florida. It is a beautiful sculpture of a mermaid, displayed at a park. As with most women, even half women half fish mermaids, boobs are involved. The controversy was the size of the breasts. Shocked residents of Wellington, never having seen breasts before, fainted and wailed when they saw the big ‘ems on this siren. They claimed it was inappropriate and the breasts were just too large!

Well, Mr. Gitzen, never expecting such a response, was finally able to acquire expert scientific assistance in resolving this controversy. Chris Brammer, engineering student at the University of Oklahoma stepped up to the plate and conducted scientific research. A quote from the newspaper article in The Oklahoma Daily:

Brammer commenced his research at the U.S. Department of Standards Web site, where he gathered voluntary standards of measurement from clothing manufacturers. He compared various data points on the mermaid with that of the clothing averages.

“She’s long from head to tail, and for her size, she’s not out of proportion,” Gitzen said of his 18-foot statue. “Chris proved that, compared to a Barbie doll, she is ‘underboobed.’”

What is next? Well, obviously – Playboy! An interesting article about that is right here.

And better still, Mr. Gitzen is toying with the idea of creating desk size Sirens! Whoa, wouldn’t that be awesome! Beautiful paper weight art. I love it. Where can I buy one???

Peace out people
SCG